When I was a young girl, I had a vision, having woken from a impromptu nap (a very rare thing for a girl my age). I had laid down on top of my bed and closed my eyes. Then opening them up suddenly, I saw huge hands surrounding me and for the first time since my mom had passed away I had total peace. I knew those were God’s hands, illuminated and grand. Last year a friend had a vision of me being held by God and I am so very held, even if I don’t always feel it. Here’s a poem I wrote recently that reminds me of those memories and even now, as I hold my kids sometimes I need to be reminded I’m held too. I’ll even note that today at service, someone prayed that I would specifically be able to fly above it all, definitely a confirmation to me of what I had written.

hold me.

Hold me when I’m not sure how to conquer

and my shield feels too heavy.

Hold me when I’m feeling excited

and it seems nothing could go wrong.

Hold me when I’m feeling blue.

and I’m trying to figure out what to do.

Hold me in the storm and when its all gone too quiet

Hold me when I’m swirling and my thoughts are loudest

Hold me when I can’t even see myself

Hold me and tell me how to cry:

Cry out Cry out. But what shall I cry?

I sing like a dove but fly like an eagle:

set my course to soar so I can fly above it all

let my soul feel the breeze in the heavens even as my feet walk through the trenches.

I am up high

Even though here I lie, prostrate.

Looking up to catch the dawn I hear the thunder call out

warning me that abundance is about to shower

patter patter patter, three drops resound

right before the sky opens up and it gets loud.

Pour out on me:

Give rhythm to my feet so I can run gracefully

Grant Cadence to my mind so I can think unitedly

Spin pattern into my hands so I can work creatively

.

I am completely silent without your vision.

A bird without her song, a spider without her web.

As I surrender my desires to you even more desires I see.

Hear my feet running, they run to you

Sense my mind working, I’m thinking of you.

Stretch out and feel my hands grasping for you.

See how my body is stretch out at your feet?

I keep giving up everything, and then a little bit more.

Pick me up and hold me:

Hold me when it all goes wrong.

Hold me when it simply goes well.

Let love ever glisten in contentment here at your feet

But let victory keep marching to combat swiftly.

Ever be Still my soul.

You, Lord, will never let me go.

Hold me.